I’m listening to “Texas Rangers” on shoutcast OTR. In tonight’s episode, Jas and Leeds are tracking down an escaped killer. dun dunnnn DUNNN!

The Rangers are informed by a guy talking through a tube that the killer has only one known acquaintance, a woman that, ahem, he is not married to. She’s not at her last known address and left no forwarding information. So, Jas, knowing the best way to find a woman, gives the order:

“Check any cosmetics mail-order suppliers for her name.”

Well, of course.

So they find her and intimidate her into letting them search her apartment. Inside they find candy wrappers, and sweets are a known habit of the killer. Lifesavers were stolen from a nearby gas station.

“It ain’t no crime eatin’ candy,” says the woman.

“Yeah,” says Jas, “but you’ve got a 30-day diet tacked to the wall over there, and from the looks of your figure, you’ve been followin’ it.” The dame folds like a wet paper napkin.

I don’t think it was satire.