The Scotto Grotto (org)

just got this in the mail!

foul language follows.

Sent: Tuesday, September 04, 2001 2:20 PM
Subject: Fw: Chain Letters

Hello, my name is Carol and I suffer from the guilt of not forwarding 50
billion fucking chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe that
if you send them on, a poor 6-year-old girl in Arkansas with a breast on her
forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before her
redneck parents sell her to a traveling freak show.
Do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you, and everyone to
whom you send “his” email, $1000? How stupid are we? “Ooooh, looky here!
If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I’ll get laid by every good
looking model in the magazine!” What a bunch of bullshit.
Basically, this message is a big KISS MY ROSEY RED ASS to all the people out
there who have nothing better to do than to send me stupid chain mail
forwards. Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my house
and sodomize me in my sleep for not continuing a chain that was started by
Peter in 5 AD and brought to this country by midget pilgrims on the
Mayflower. Fuck them.
If you’re going to forward something, at least send me something mildly
amusing. I’ve seen all the “send this to 10 of your closest friends, and
this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a nickel
from some omniscient being” forwards about 900 times!! I don’t fucking care.
Show a little intelligence and think about what you’re actually contributing
to by sending out these forwards. Chances are, it’s your own unpopularity.
The point being? If you get some chain letter that’s threatening to leave
you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it. If it’s
funny, send it on. Don’t piss people off by making them feel guilty about a
leper in Botswana with no teeth who has been tied to a dead elephant for
27 years and whose only salvation is the 5 cents per letter he’ll receive if
you forward this email.

Now forward this to everyone you know. Otherwise, tomorrow morning your
underwear will turn carnivorous and will consume your genitals.