Drinking games are the lowest form of social interaction outside of a wedding reception, but just like they did with crappy cartoons and physics lessons, Super Friends make everything better. So I wrote up some rules for the SUPER FRIENDS DRINKING GAME. All of these are open to modification, and you’re encouraged to have another drink whenever the Super Friends inspire you to, even if it’s not in the official rulebook. Here are your guidelines, I hope it finally brings Super Fans and alcoholics together.

Drink every time you hear the words SPACE or SUPER. For example, if Myxpltk says, “I’ll send you super yo-yos into space on this space rocket!” that’s three drinks. And if you’re nitpicky, this is every instance of space and super, so Superman’s name counts, and you drink even if someone’s just talking about regular space and not outer-space. Like, “There’s enough space left in my belt for two more five gallon Bat-jugs, Robin!”

Speaking of Bat, if you hear the word BAT, and it’s followed by a device, vehicle, or action, you drink. Like the Bat-Jetboat, a Bat-Punch, or just a Nuclear Bat-Laser.

Note: Batman’s in almost every episode, but if he isn’t, you still have to make your liver work. No Batman means you drink every time you hear the words MAGIC LASSO, VISION (x-ray, telescopic, heat, infra red, or any other kind), or TELEPATHY (no matter how Aquaman conjugates it). It’s hard for the Super Friends to even walk down the hall without at least the narrator shouting out most of those words. In fact, drink to all four words. If Superman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, and Batman are all in the episode, tough it out.

Drink any time a Super Friend speaks the wrong language. This counts if they slip into their native tongue because of excitement, or if they just need to do it to get their powers to work like Apache Chief and Samurai. Good luck staying out of the hospital if you’re watching an episode with El Dorado in it.

Take a drink whenever someone lets out an exclamation catchphrase. Those usually start with “Great…” like “Great Krypton!” or “Great Hera!” The Wonder Twins say “JUPITERS!”, and Robin will say “Holy you’re friggin’ wasted! Time to take another one!” Whatever they say, though; their excitement means your toxicity level rises.

Drink whenever someone’s GOT TO do something. Villains will say that they MUST do something, and you drink then too. Whoever’s saying it though, your drinking should turn into chugging if they’ve GOT TO do something AND FAST.

If the Super Friends ONLY HAVE ONE CHANCE at something or have to do something JUST RIGHT, that’s a drink. And before you do it, you should say, “ONLY TIME FOR ONE DRINK!”

After you play this long enough, you can’t pay close enough attention to notice when someone says SPACE or BAT, so you have to modify the rules. For the big finish of the game, drink whenever there’s a shooting star scene transition, and whenever the Wonder Twins activate or deactivate their Wonder Twin Powers.

RECAP:

Basics:

1. “Space”
2. “Super”
3. “Bat-Something”, “Vision,” “Telepathy,” and “Magic Lasso.”
4. “Great Something!”
5. Foreign Language
6. “I’VE GOT TO…”
7. Just one chance!

Secondary:

1. Wonder Twins Activate/Deactivate
2. Star scene transitions

Bonus:

1. Person on the Trouble Alert has a hat.
2. Narrator. CHUG if he says space.