The Scotto Grotto (org)

Newtilla the Red is on a primal tear tonight, playing at being some sort of dwarf sabre-toothed tiger. Note to kelliebellie… he is growing larger, but his head and tail are remaining the same length… can it be he’s mutating?

For Destroll….

I AM THE VERY MODEL OF A MAJOR SUPER-CRIMINAL

THE MASTER-MIND
I am the very model of a major super-criminal
My costume is impeccable, my inhibitions minimal
My plans for world dominion are both logical and sensible,
But only those who envy me dare call them reprehensible.
I’ve mass-destruction in my grasp, atomic and bacterical,
But sharpest yet my rapier wit is honed with barbs satyrical,
I’ve kryptonite, from green to white, for any such occasions
That I failed to factor Superman into my grand equations.

HENCHMEN
That he failed to factor Superman into my grand equations.
That he failed to factor Superman into my grand equations.
That he failed to factor Superman into my grand equations.

THE MASTER-MIND
Napoleon and Hitler were my gurus philosophical,
And Dr. Doom my mentor in my studies catastrophical,
I’ve added all the latest of improvements to my cranium,
From eyeballs periscopic to a coating of titanium.

HENCHMEN
He’s added all the latest of improvements to his cranium,
From eyeballs telescopic to a coating of titanium.

THE MASTER-MIND
Of killing I’m a master, from zoology insidious,
To film critique in ways unique, and ambuscades euclidious,
My soul was bartered long ago to creatures quite infernal,
A price I paid quite gladly in exchange for life eternal;

With each and every stratagem I’m nearer to my victory
Except for super-heroes with opinions contradictory;
They upset my calculations which annoys me without measure,
And upon my hordes of lackies must be vented my displeasure…

HENCHMEN
[gradually inching off the stage]
Upon his hordes of lackies must be vented his displeasure
Upon his hordes of lackies must be vented his displeasure
Upon his hordes of lackies must be vented his displeasure…

THE MASTER-MIND
I wriggle through the penal codes through circumstance extenuous,
By employing only barristers reptilian and sinuous;
I escape from federal prisons and dimensions quite ethereal,
In time for juice and coffee, and a modest bowl of cereal.

HENCHMEN
[from the wings]
In time for juice and coffee, and a modest bowl of cereal,
In time for juice and coffee, and a modest bowl of cereal,
In time for juice and coffee, and a modest bowl of cereal

THE MASTER-MIND
For all my vast resources I have yet to be victorious,
But triumph now is imminent; the carnage will be glorious,
At last I shall achieve my quest for power unequivocal:
I am the very model of a major super-criminal!

HENCHMEN
At last he shall achieve his quest for power unequivocal:
He is the very model of a major super-criminal!