Beware the beast man,
for he is the devil’s pawn.
Alone among God’s primates,
he kills for sport, for lust, for greed.
Yea, he will murder his brother to possess his brother’s land.
Let him not breed in great numbers,
for he will make a desert of his home, and yours.
Shun him. Drive him back into his jungle lair,
for he is the harbinger of death.
(Courtesy: The Planet of the Apes)
Production Concept: We Like Pie
Brief Summary: Four people on a road trip reflect on their travels, and review sampled pie along the way.
Extended Summary (selling points): Think ‘Road Rules’ in book format. Two girls and two guys driving around, going through the trials and triumphs of traveling from point to point, having a good time, but not without the dramatic point or two. Four distinctly different personalities, with a common goal, Pie. Included will be ‘biographies’ written about each of the journeymen, by each of them. (I.E. Scott writes bios for everyone, Kevin writes bios for everyone, etc.) Also, there’ll be commentary about the trip from center to center, and reviews of the pies sampled. Reviews will understandably vary from person to person. Each person will get two slices per visit, a ‘signature pie’ and a varied slice of choice. (I.E. Nicole will always get a slice of apple pie, and at least taste some sort of other pie.) Pictures of the travels are a must. Cover shot idea: Nicole and Heather in pink waitress outfits, pie in hand, over shoulder, Kevin and Scott squishing each other’s face with same. (Preemptive or after attack?) Possible spin-offs: We Like Soup, We Like Naps, and We Don’t Like Liver & Onions. Perhaps a ‘We Like Pie’ franchise, vending pies to those who would be cool like us…Planet Hollywood style, with paraphernalia from the original road trip.
Distribution Methods: Preferably by a standard publishing house, but guerrilla-style COD marketing if needed. J
Pies already sampled: Nicole: Apple with Vanilla, and Scott: Chocolate Sundae Pie, Served by Phyllis, at Denny’s, Pompano Beach, September 12, 1998. Nicole: Apple with Chocolate, IHOP at Pompano Beach, on October 7, 1998.
Scott’s take on the Gang: (as of 10/5/98)
Kevin: Well, I’ve known Kevin for quite a long time now. Since 1984, back in the good old days of high school, as it were. I made fun of his brother at a school function, and we’ve been fast friends ever since. We shared enough common interests to hang around and filmed silly home-movies that only the makers can appreciate, or even enjoy. Kevin is quite the throwback, behavior-wise, in the best of all possible meanings. A noble, honest, genuine, giving person, he doesn’t drink, smoke or consume any non-prescription drug, including aspirin, as far as I know. He’s somebody I’d gladly let marry my sister, if I had one. A science fiction fan, a connoisseur of vintage television (especially cartoons), and a scholar of historic warfare, especially World War Two. Tastes in music run from Frank Sinatra to Phil Collins, with a smattering of Julie Andrews in there for taste. He has a good sense of humor, (from my point of view, anyhow) in that he can make stunning observations on the world around him in the blink of an eye, from bodily functions to references to ancient episodes of Happy Days. He’s gentle to children and adults alike, and I’ve never known him to get angry without undue cause. He gives to charity, an unusual trait in someone his age, has a strong sense of right and wrong, and even better, acts on that sense. Not only mentally fit, he takes reasonable care of himself physically, and has spent a number of years studying the martial arts (as of this writing, he’s rapidly approaching his black belt.) He only gives advice if asked, and when he gives it, it’s usually the good stuff. If I had to pick a flaw in his character, I’d be hard pressed to find one, save that if someone can be generous to fault, he is. Super-hero personality closest to his is Superman. My final analysis: Kevin Albury is the perennial ‘Mr. Nice Guy’. He’s swell, and represents the Daddy of the group.
Nicole: Both of the girls came along in my travels much later, when I returned to work with Kevin for the second time. Nicole I’ve known about five months, and she’s a nice person. Among her strengths I’d say one of her greatest is that she has quite an element of Will Rogers to her personality, in that she can get along well with virtually everyone she meets, and is the most outgoing of the lot of us. She also has a definitely powerful sense of satire when it comes to watching how people work together. Not only does Nicole have a lovely demeanor; her visage is about as easy on the eyes as it gets around here. Nicknamed Scully by Kevin, (in honor of the X-files character, natch,) she’s quite well designed physically. Odd but cute traits include a ‘Zelda-blink’; (fans of Dobie Gillis will understand what I’m talking about), a quirky smile, and the first circumstance of an actual bubbly-sort of laugh. I honestly think it sounds like a giggle of soda pop rising up, very neat, and pretty infectious. Her company is always welcome, as a guy can talk about ‘boy-stuff’ in her presence. She possesses a strong common sense, even if it isn’t always acted on. (In other words, she one of the people I know who is otherwise intelligent but still smokes. Forget the common cold, I want a quick, easy cure for nicotine addiction.) Personally, I think that she and Kevin would make a cute couple, but she suffers from the “but we’re already such good friends, I don’t want to wreck it” syndrome. Regardless, I consider her a pal, and so does he. Super-Hero personality closest to hers is She-Hulk (sensational, not savage). My final analysis: Nicole Hanak is ?!?
Heather: The ‘little sister’ of the group, more to follow.
Went to the 5th annual Jerry Garcia Birthday bash in south Florida.
5 hours of grateful dead music, hippy food, and assorted fun stuff. Had a grand time. Discovered an ex-stalker (psycho-chick) got herself pregnant, and has a baby now! Hopefully this will keep Bev out of the running for hunting ol’ Scotto down now, as she has something else to focus attention on.
Had vegan gumbo and potato salad, and penang Thai tofu for supper, some lemon cake & coffee while playing yahtzee with buddies Cathi & Dave. I enjoyed myself immensely.
I need to get ahold of Robby, H and Bri for lunch sometime next week. I’ve not seen or heard from them in a while. 12-8 tomorrow at work, then back to the 4pm to midnight shift again, once tuan returns. I’d love to keep the 12-8 shift, for just Fridays, if I could.
maybe 3 up, 2 down?
Seemed to get along very well with April today. Yay!
Little brother (6’6″, and 29 in September is little?!?) got a job at a bar on Los Olas, something Amici. Looks like he’s making about 85 a day on non-season, so that’ll take good care of him, I feel.
All in all a good day. I need to go shopping to renew food supplies.
Green Lantern’s ring was the most powerful weapon in the universe except against the color yellow. I’m not kidding, his weakness was the color yellow. You might think he’d try to keep something like that secret, but there is nothing Green Lantern liked to talk about more. He’d wave a fist at the bad guys and shout, “Justice will prevail today, villains! Unless you learn that my power energy cannot affect that which is yellow!” And to make Green Lantern the most unlucky person in the universe, his nemesis Sinestro had a ring that made things that were yellow. That’s like twin brothers fighting, only one gets baseball bat with spikes and has a giant purple head.
Green Lantern got his super ring when a navy bean-headed alien crash landed on Earth and handed it to him right before he died. I guess in space no one makes out a will. When you think you’re about to die, you pick up a phone book and give everything you own to whatever name your finger lands on. And if you’re handing over a potentially universe-threatening weapon, even better that it goes to a randomly selected stranger!
Serious Fact: I keep a white board by my VCR, and marked down every time Green Lantern’s powers worked against yellow. Out of 30 episodes where Green Lantern appeared, his powers worked against the color yellow 24 times. In fact, in 3 episodes, the stuff he made was yellow already. It had to be something wrong with my TV, since I figured if you made a yellow rocket that couldn’t touch the color yellow, the world would explode. No, my TV was fine. Either the guys who colored the show had all their green markers dry up, or they got hammered before they started.
The ring could make anything he could think of which usually wasn’t much. Once or twice he’d go crazy with it and if he needed to knock something over, he’d create himself a crazy robot bulldozer and a viking hard hat, but most days he would just shoot green energy at the thing until it fell over. The Wonder Twins may have sucked, but when they needed to knock something over, they never took it out the easy way. At their most sensical, they’d turn into a giant lobster (with water backpack) or a rhino squid (in ice belt). Green Lantern would punch people with things as uncreative as a giant hand. He had to know kids were watching; he could have tried harder to make it more interesting. Like a giant hand with breasts or a talking hamburger.
 It’s a pretty common assumption that Batman and Robin were lovers, but Batman at least tried to hide it. He put a little belt on Robin so it looked like he was a fellow crime fighter, not just some kid he puts his tongue in when there’s no evil to punch. Kids watching the show could defend him. They could tell their parents, “No, look. Robin has his own crime belt. I told you he wasn’t his boyfriend.” Green Lantern wasn’t so clever. Kairo had nothing that indicated he should be fighting for justice, and spent most of his time with his crotch firmly pressed against Green Lantern’s ass. While we’re talking about it, I don’t think Aquaman and Aqualad were romantic, but only because it’s impossible to imagine Aquaman getting laid by anyone. |
Green Lantern’s sidekick was the coolest. The cartoon called him “Hal Jordan’s Venutian helper.” He was a little boy from Venus named Kairo and he never did anything other than get captured. He was real good at that, though.
Kairo didn’t care. He never got his own flying saucer or invisible jetski or any type of weapon. You know how he travelled? He actually had to ride Green Lantern’s ass through space. Of all the heroes in the universe, Green Lantern’s the only one that can make a motorcycle with his mind. Kairo should have been the last sidekick that needed to resort to a piggyback ride. And when they got to other planets, Green Lantern didn’t make him a green boomerang. Kairo had to pick a fight with nothing but a vacant smile. Hey, atomic monster. Try a taste of Kairo’s innocent sense of well being!
I don’t know how Green Lantern recruited him. Kairo was probably selling candy bars door-to-door, and after Green Lantern bought 12 cases, he received the bonus prize, “Spend a day the rest of your life with Kairo!”
I love little Newtie more than corn flakes. (in)
J’aime peu de Newtie davantage que des flocons d’avoine. (back) I like little Newtie more that rolled oats.
Ich liebe wenig Newtie mehr als Corn Flakes. (back) I love few Newtie more than Corn Flakes
Eu amo pouco Newtie mais do que flocos de milho. (back)I like few Newtie more than the rolled oats
Amo poco Newtie más que las avenas. (back) – Master little Newtie more than oats.
eating veggie-dogs, chatting with Zoe, and watching h2g2 on my old VCR.
food today:
3 veggie dogs
4 slices of black olive & mushroom pizza.
Items of interest to me.
Caught April in 2 lies between the hours of 10pm and 12 PM tonight. 1 regarding how much she drank, another of her not eating my food. I didn’t even challenge, because she is out of here in 3 weeks and counting. I don’t care if she lies to me anymore, but she’d better not steal.
Newtie is grooming me, licking the back of my head! Good, lovey kitty.
Met my new everway group. Some nice folks, 3 slob-tech gamers, and one wife-gamer.
Jeffery – met over the net, he found me in a gamer’s directory. Nice guy, as old as I am, married to Bee (Bridgett? Beatrice?) Used to service the machines where I work, and is GM. Kind enough to pick me up and take me home from the game. Seems to dash of on tangents, I imagine staying on topic during the game will be a challenge, but not impossible, fortunately that doesn’t bug me much. 31
Bee – South African, very pleasant, entertaining & gracious. She seems to enjoy my quirks (all of them came up tonight, it seems, from vegetarianism, carelessness, to waving at graveyards.) was amused by some of my stories, and her Afrikaans is close enough to German that we could make silly comments. Met husband over IRC, net wedding. 🙂 23
Joe – Seemed nice, didn’t get a strong vibe, still new to rpg, looks to be suffering a bit from tech burnout. has a palm IIIE 24
Chris?(not sure of name) The only skinny one of us, witty, and quick to adapt to most social behaviors. He’s the gamer who quotes python, makes squirrel and slug comments, and is a primary distraction during the game. I’m sure I’ll get on well with him. 22
Aleria (Bee’s visiting sister from Italy) Cute young lady, fond of train spotting and ewen macgregor, Speaks buckets of languages, and is quite polite and conversant, even though her English is a bit broken. 17
I think I came off as ‘mentor-man’ or maybe ‘overbearing man’ depending on the person. I maintained politeness and helped out where possible, tried not to step on conversations, but may have. It’s funny, I’m confident the girls like me, and Chris, but am not terribly sure of Joe and Jeffery. (they probably did too, just didn’t get a strong congenial vibe)
Many good characters.